Tuesday, 19 October 2010

Monday 18th October 10

The day started reasonably well but both boys were unwell and off school, and due to this there was an incident which left me feeling crap.  I do my best to be a good parent but sometimes feel like a failure.

I spent quite a bit of the morning talking to various people on NHS Direct, which is a wonderful service and i felt really well looked after.  The results of the conversations may well be positive.

Later, there was another incident, to do with a misunderstanding by another family member and caused by the thoughtlessness of another, which resulted in bad vibes all round.  I was hoping for an apology from the person who caused the problem by accidentally betraying confidence, but just got rudeness and a snub.  It is true that you don't choose your family, and it's odd that I still love them all, despite everything.

I do not set out to upset, provoke and cause distress.  I am sorry that both people are feeling the way they are.  I hope communication can resume soon.

The garden was my solace... for a while, and I also popped round to help a neighbour round the corner who'd emailed me to ask me to take some wooden pallets away.  She showed me her newly built 'insect hotel' (I'd call it a hibernaculum) and then one of her neighbours offered me some pears.

I spent a considerable time inside, doing washing up, dealing with fruit, playing Scrabble on facebook and trying to manage the second situation. 

Later, I lit the front room stove for the first time this Autumn.  The first time the stove is lit after a few months cold, the dust burns off and there's a bit of an aroma.  So I lit it quite late on, after the boys went to bed, so that if we need to light it with the forecast cold snap in the next few days, no-one complains about the smell.

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