Sunday 24th October 10

A mixed day, with some nice time by myself doing assorted stuff in the garden, but some difficult times too which I won't dwell on. 

I collected several sacks and boxes from Country Fresh and it was nice to see Richard, but I really wasn't feeling too jolly.

I escaped into the front garden and chopped logs but I had a very grumpy day.  I enjoyed a good programme about David Attenborough but after that went out on the bike to collect another log or three.  Going out on my bike always makes me feel better and collecting logs has a doubly good effect.

Monday 25th January 10

Bit of an early start which put me in a low mood for most of the day. Also more email traffic which left me feeling not so good, re the asking permission to tell someone's story. The family member seems to think it was wrong of me to contact them... I could have just told the story, without asking permission, but I'm glad I did as I like to try and behave ethically. Without giving anything away which would identify the person or their family, a few years ago one of my friends died, in unusual circumstances, and I thought the story ought to be told, as part of a campaign which is about to happen. I told the bones of the story to the campaign organiser and they were very interested... but suggested I get permission from the family. I do not have that permission, therefore the story won't be told. Which is a pity, as it is an enlightening one, sad, but really interesting.

Never mind, I got on with some paperwork... two receipt letters and some other bits and bobs. Paperwork never makes me skip and jump, and today it just made me feel grumpy. I couldn't face doing my accounts/tax.

Later in the day I did a bit of chainsawing and stacking, and made tea for the family who went to the dentist after school. I did cauliflower cheese and macaroni, with butternut squash. It was very nice, a simple but wholesome meal.

I had a quiet evening, but did various stuff on the computer and watched a couple of good programmes... one with Billie Piper interviewing Dr Brooke Magnanti, and then the BBC programme about chemistry.

Monday 28th December 09

A far from easy day. I needed to find the Christmas Day Fiddlesticks paperwork and that took ages and then I had a phone call with my agent which was difficult.

I got outside after lunch and finished the logpile to the left of the front door, and sorted out some other woody stuff. Later in the day I had an important email to do and that was difficult too.

I spent lots of time playing Scrabble on facebook and doing thing around the house but felt not 100% today. Hope tomorrow will be better.

Wednesday 26th November 08

I came downstairs when Gill asked me to, to keep an eye on our little darlings whilst she got ready. I sat and shelled pumpkin seeds whilst the boys got dressed, and when they went I went back to bed. Didn't feel like breakfast.

Didn't get up til 11am as I had to go into town to have my eyes tested, as there's a strong likelihood I'll get glaucoma as several family members have had it. But my eyes are still fine, the only deterioration is that as I'm in my 40s, my near vision is receeding, if that's the right way to put it. Basically, I cannot focus on things as close as I could when I was younger, this is normal and expected.

I gave in the planning panel paperwork, collected a couple of sacks of orange skins from Dylan and then at Country Fresh, a huge sack of ivy and clematis which some nutter had binned. Very compostable... home for lunch, I had a hearty one as I'd missed breakfast, the first time in many years, just was feeling so low I didn't bother. But the cycling and activity had helped my mood and I had lunch, chatted with Gill, lit the stove, washed up etc. When 3pm came Gill offered to go to school and I took the ivy and oranges to St Nicks for composting, and on the way back collected 3 bags of compostables from the new supermarket, as they're now saving these resources for me to recycle. Put a load in the compostumbler at home, but saved okra, baby aubergines and plantain for doing something with.

Also finished doing the latest woodpile by the front door. Still wasn't hungry much so went to bed for a couple of hours mope. However, one good thing, my eldest son is pleased that I have no diagnosis, and I thanked him for his positivity. I still need time to readjust to this new set of circumstances. My sister too is positive (see yesterday's comments) which is lovely, thanks Mrs. Happy. I love you too, just the way you are!

I got up at 8 and had a bit of pasta and watched 'Oceans' with the family, had a quiet evening, peeling pears and slicing apples and balancing them on the stove to dry.